It is impossible to experience one’s death objectively and still carry a tune.

Nothing worth knowing can be understood with the mind.

When I was in school, I cheated on my metaphysics exam I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.

I don’t want to achieve immortality through my work… I want to achieve it through not dying.

Should I marry W. Not if she won’t tell me the other letters in her name.

The good people sleep much better at night than the bad people. Of course, the bad people enjoy the waking hours much more.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

I am at two with nature.

Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick — not wounded — dead.

I call that mind free which jealously guards its intellectual rights and powers, which calls no man master, which does not content itself with a passive or hereditary faith, and receives new truth as an angel from Heaven.

It’s not that I’m afraid to die, I just don’t want to be there when it happens.

I took a speed reading course and read ‘War and Peace’ in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.

On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done just as easily lying down.

The great roe is a mythological beast with the head of a lion and the body of a lion, though not the same lion.

At the opera in Milan with my daughter and me, Needleman leaned out of his box and fell into the orchestra pit. Too proud to admit it was a mistake, he attended the opera every night for a month and repeated it each time.

Basically my wife was immature. I’d be at home in the bath and she’d come in and sink my boats.

Thought Why does man kill He kills for food. And not only food frequently there must be a beverage.

Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.