The factory of the future will have two employees a man and a dog. The man’s job will be to feed the dog. The dog’s job will be to prevent the man from touching any of the automated equipment.
The most dangerous leadership myth is that leaders are born-that there is a genetic factor to leadership. This myth asserts that people simply either have certain charismatic qualities or not. That’s nonsense in fact, the opposite is true. Leaders are made rather than born. Failing organizations are usually over-managed and under-led.
You need people who can walk their companies into the future rather than back them into the future.
Commencement speakers have a good deal in common with grandfather clocks Standing usually some six feet tall, typically ponderous in construction, more traditional than functional, their distinction is largely their noisy communication of essentially commonplace information.
Wayne Tell me, when the first show is over, will you still love me when I’m an incredibly humungoid giant star Cassandra Yeah. Wayne Will you still love me when I’m in my hanging-out-with-Ravi-Shankar phase Cassandra Yeah. Wayne Will you still love me when I’m in my carbohydrate, sequined-jumpsuit, young-girls-in-white-cotton-panties, waking-up-in-a-pool-of-your-own-vomit, bloated-purple-dead-on-a-toilet phase Cassandra Yeah. Wayne Okay, party. Bonus.
Wayne Am I supposed to be a man, am I supposed to say, it’s OK, I don’t mind. I don’t mind. Well I mind I mind big time And you know what the worst part is I NEVER LEARNED TO READ.
Wayne I once thought I had mono for an entire year, It turned out I was just really bored.
Wayne Garth, marriage is punishment for shoplifting in some countries.
Benjamin Hey, who wants Chinese Takeout I know a great place Wayne I’ll have the cream of sum yung guy.
Garth Did you ever find Bugs Bunny attractive when he put on a dress and played girl bunny
Stacy Happy anniversary, Wayne. Wayne Stacy, we broke up two months ago. Stacy Well, that doesn’t mean we can’t still go out, does it Wayne Well, it does actually, that’s what breaking up is.
Wayne All I have to say about that is asphinctersayswhat. Arcade owner What Wayne Exactly.
When I find myself in the company of scientists, I feel like a shabby curate who has strayed by mistake into a room full of dukes.
What the mass media offers is not popular art, but entertainment which is intended to be consumed like food, forgotten, and replaced by a new dish.
Some books are undeservedly forgotten none are undeservedly remembered.
A poet’s hope to be, like some valley cheese, local, but prized elsewhere.
We are here on Earth to do good to others. What the others are here for, I don’t know.
No opera plot can be sensible, for people do not sing when they are feeling sensible.
Murder is unique in that it abolishes the party it injures, so that society has to take the place of the victim and on his behalf demand atonement or grant forgiveness it is the one crime in which society has a direct interest.
Among those whom I like or admire, I can find no common denominator, but among those whom I love, I can all of them make me laugh.